The past couple weeks presented odd situations and conversations that caused me to look inward. Something that's so important and often ugly. I hate unwrapping my heart at times. It's a present that I'm not sure I want anyone to recieve. My bows are lavish, pretty, and tied tightly. They unravel and reveal dollar store gifts, penny candy, left overs. Sometimes, just a bunch of good for nothins.
The highlight was Monday afternoon at an apple orchard. Our family decided to take a day to be together and enjoy the unseasonably warm wonderful weather that we've been blessed with. Near 80 with no humidity and lots of blue skies. As we pulled up to the orchard we noticed a group of unique individuals milling around the spot we were headed for. They were Yogi's and lived on a commune. No electricity, no running water. They share everything for the common good of everyone. They looked very different. Caden thought they lived in another country. I didnt have to ask what they belived because their beliefs were woven elequently into everything they said. They were confident and gentle. They were kind and friendly. The young age of the children did not dictate or limit there ablilities to speak "their" truth or beliefs. It was not what they thought or believed, it was who they were. There were 3 adults and about 8 children. They were some of the most well behaved controlled children I have seen. They were some of the friendliest women I have met. One of the "spiritual teachers" was only 18 herself but her eyes and prescence spoke of experience and determination far beyond those years. We chatted and spoke of light things. My mind, of course was all over the place. I prayed, I yearned for an "oppurtunity". I listened to them talk and felt a bit of jealousy. I am suppose to be salt and light. However, I felt like my salt shaker was empty, I felt like a shadow. Just that am prior to leaving our house I listened to James McDonald preach about boldness. He spoke of Paul and the confidence in which he presented his beliefs. He spoke of the unrefutable power of the simple message of the cross. He spoke and I listened and understood and believed. Yet standing there today, I was unsure of how to approach such a group. So I watched and absorbed. I secretly wished we had more people like them on our "team":>
I am certain they are not perfect. I am certain they struggle with the same ugly heart issues. However, I am certain that if true believers were to be so bold and kind our world would be different and the kingdom of God bigger. If we, like them disciplined ourselves to eliminate so much of the worlds noise and influences perhaps we would here our Lord louder and translate his message clearer. We are to go to all the world but I think we often forget that our world starts in our back yard. You don't have to go to the edge of civilization to meet those who haven't heard, or those who may have heard but don't understand. If we could only be a better advertisement...if our lives were a better reflection of Him.
I had many conversations this week that made me think about the way we respond as Christians to one another and to the world. We are in this world but not suppose to be of it. Yet, I think that we blend in so well there is no difference. We look the same, we sound the same, we respond to one another the same way, we forget to forgive. Our grace and security creates passiveness. We surround ourselves with other like minded individuals and forget to reach out. We protect our children to the point of hindering growth and understanding. We often remove ourselves from uncomfortable, unfamiliar situations to "protect" ourselves and hurt Christ while doing so. I want to be wise. I want my families heart to be sensitive to others and their needs. I want understanding. I want for us to know when to speak and when to be silent. I want our passion to point to peace and not dominance. To help and not hinder. To be part of the picture but not in the way. 
They synced we were different, "enlightened", and continued our conversing beyond the typical few moments of casual exchange. For this I was thankful that our spirits spoke. I praise God that a HOLY spirit lives within my children, my husband, and I.They wanted to engage with us. I wanted to engage with them. There Yogi's and they are also a creation of God...knit together...loved...saught after by a savior.
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